Golfer Doubt: Do I Have What It Takes to Play Golf?
"What if I hold them up?"
"What if I embarrass myself?"
"What if I look like a fool?"
"I'll never golf with people who I know are good because I'd hold them up."
Sound familiar? If you've ever felt these doubts creeping in when someone mentions golf, you're not alone. These are actual quotes from women in our community - smart, accomplished, confident women who somehow lose all that confidence the moment golf enters the conversation.
Here's what I want you to know: You absolutely have what it takes to play golf. The question isn't about your capability - it's about overcoming the stories you're telling yourself.
My Golf Origin Story (Plot Twist: It Wasn't Love at First Swing)
Before I became obsessed with golf, I thought it was a man's sport. I actually thought it was quite boring.
Before COVID, I was a huge fan of group gym classes - high intensity interval training workouts, spin classes, yoga. I loved the energy, the community, the immediate feedback of a good sweat session. When COVID hit and all the classes went away, I decided to try golf since it offered me a way to get fresh air, a workout (walking the golf course with my push cart), and some safe social interaction.
But here's the thing - I was unsure I had the patience to play. Golf seemed so... slow. So methodical. So completely different from the instant gratification I was used to.
More than 20 years ago, fresh out of college, I had tried golf once with colleagues from work. It was a beautiful, rural course, and everyone was really nice. But I'd never hit a golf ball before that day.
I remember feeling exhausted - tired from being out in the sun and hungry from being on the course for what felt like forever. It was probably just 9 holes, but it felt like an eternity. The hardest part was being frustrated by not being able to get the ball forward and airborne. It looked like everyone else was doing that so easily!
I swore golf was not for me after that experience.
The Question That Changes Everything
But when I think back now, I wonder: why didn't I pick it up sooner?
Because here's what I discovered when I gave golf a real chance: I definitely had what it took. I just needed to work at the different skills required.
That's the key insight that changes everything. It's not about having some mysterious "golf gene" or being naturally athletic in a specific way. It's about understanding that golf is a collection of different skills that you develop over time.
Driving the ball is totally different from hitting irons, which completely differs from standing over a putt. Each skill builds independently, and with time, they all come together.
The Real Barriers Aren't What You Think
Based on conversations with hundreds of women in our community, here are the real barriers that keep smart, capable women from trying golf:
"I don't have the patience for golf"
This was my biggest concern. I was used to high-intensity workouts where you could see progress immediately. Golf seemed so slow, so methodical.
The reality: Golf's pace is actually one of its greatest gifts. In our hyper-connected, always-on world, golf forces you to slow down, to be present, to focus on one shot at a time. What feels like "slow" at first becomes meditative and restorative.
"I'll embarrass myself in front of others"
This fear runs deep. We've all heard stories about golf being intimidating, about unforgiving golfers who get impatient with beginners.
The reality: The vast majority of golfers are incredibly welcoming to beginners, especially women. Most golfers remember their own struggles and are genuinely happy to see more people enjoying the game. When you're honest about your skill level upfront, people appreciate it and often become your biggest cheerleaders.
"I'm not athletic enough"
This one breaks my heart because it's often code for "I'm not young enough" or "I'm not fit enough" or "I don't look like a golfer."
The reality: Golf is one of the most inclusive sports you can play. You can make accommodations for almost any physical condition - riding in a cart versus walking, teeing your ball up even on the fairway due to arthritis, playing from forward tees. I've played with women in their 70s who regularly out-drive me. Athletic ability helps, but it's not a prerequisite.
"I don't know the rules"
Golf etiquette and rules can feel overwhelming, especially when you're watching other people who seem to know exactly what they're doing.
The reality: You don't need to know every rule to start playing. You need to know the basics of safety, pace of play, and common courtesy. Everything else you can learn as you go. Most golfers are happy to help when you ask.
"It's too expensive"
Golf can be expensive, but it doesn't have to be prohibitively so.
The reality: You can start playing golf on a reasonable budget. Many public courses offer beginner-friendly rates, you can find good used equipment, and you don't need to join a country club to enjoy the game. As with any hobby, you can invest more as you get more serious about it.
What You Actually Need to Play Golf (Spoiler: It's Less Than You Think)
After my first two seasons of playing once in a while, and then three seasons of playing very regularly… Including helping hundreds of women start their golf journeys through local events, clinics and organizing leagues… here's what you actually need:
Physical requirements:
Ability to walk or ride in a cart
Basic hand-eye coordination (if you can hit a tennis ball or catch a ball, you have enough)
Willingness to learn new movement patterns… your flexibility and “golf muscles” will fill in over time!
Mental requirements:
Patience with yourself as you learn… lots of patience!
Ability to laugh at bad shots (this is crucial!)
Willingness to focus on improvement rather than perfection
Equipment requirements:
A basic set of clubs (you can start with 5-7 clubs)
Comfortable golf shoes
Appropriate attire for the course
A golf glove, tees, and golf balls
Knowledge requirements:
Basic safety awareness
Understanding of pace of play
Willingness to ask questions and learn as you go
That's it. Really.
My Golf Reality Check (Because I Want You to Have Realistic Expectations)
I'm not going to lie to you and say golf is easy or that you'll be great right away. Here's where I am after a few years of regular play:
My handicap is 34 (for context, that's still considered a beginner/high handicap)
I play weekly in a league that I organize
I feel comfortable getting on the course with anyone at this point
I'm still working on improving every skill, and I am super average in terms of technical ability
But here's what matters: I am comfortable and confident. I enjoy every round. I've built incredible friendships. I've gained access to networking opportunities I never would have had otherwise. And with time, those small improvements have made a huge impact on my enjoyment of the game.
The Confidence Timeline: What to Expect
After your first lesson: You'll understand the basic mechanics and feel less intimidated by the equipment.
After 3-4 lessons: You'll be able to make consistent contact with the ball and understand basic course management.
After playing 5-6 rounds: You'll feel comfortable with the pace and etiquette of golf… Pro tip: I recommend starting with Par 3 courses which are shorter and you can see the pin from the tee box.
After your first season: You'll have your favorite clubs, know at least some of your typical distances, and feel confident booking tee times.
In less time than you think: You'll be the woman encouraging other beginners and wondering why you waited so long to start.
Stop Letting Perfect Be the Enemy of Good Enough
Here's what I wish someone had told me 20 years ago: You don't have to be good at golf to enjoy golf. You don't have to be good at golf to benefit from golf. You don't have to be good at golf to belong on the golf course.
Golf is the only sport where beginners and experts can play together meaningfully thanks to the handicap system. Your boss might have a 12 handicap while you're starting at 30, and you can still contribute to your team's success in a scramble format.
The women who succeed at golf aren't necessarily the most naturally athletic. They're the ones who show up consistently, stay patient with the learning process, and focus on enjoyment over perfection.
Your Next Step: Stop Wondering and Start Discovering
If you're reading this and still wondering "Do I have what it takes?" here's my challenge to you: Stop wondering and start discovering.
The only way to know if you have what it takes is to take the first step. Book a lesson. Hit some balls at the driving range. Play a par-3 course with a friend.
Because here's what I know about you already: If you're successful in other areas of your life, if you're curious enough to read articles about golf, if you're thoughtful enough to consider the investment of time and energy - you absolutely have what it takes.
Ready to stop doubting and start discovering what you're capable of?
Join my free live training: "From Nervous Beginner to Natural Golfer: Your Kickstart to Golf Success."
Register here: https://www.queencitylinksladies.com/training
In this training, I'll show you exactly how to build confidence on the golf course from day one, the specific skills you need to develop (and the order to develop them in), and how to go from nervous beginner to someone who genuinely enjoys every round.
Because you don't just have what it takes to play golf. You have what it takes to love it.
Ready to discover what you're truly capable of on the golf course? Your journey from doubt to confidence starts with one click.
